It's been awhile and I FEEL...

...I feel sometimes just a little overwhelmed. Okay, I lied. I always feel completely overwhelmed. My life, mostly by choice is simply that way. I don't know how to sit still. I am constantly moving somewhere. Physically I am always moving, my fingers are tapping or my leg is bouncing or I am biting my nails. But what I am really talking about is the constant motion in my head. I have massive attention deficit. Thank the good Lord that they weren't diagnosing that back in my day. I guess it wouldn't have mattered, by parents wouldn't have put me on drugs anyway. But I really do have massive ADD. I am not a guy with a one track mind. My wife is, but I am not. haha. Here is what I am currently working on:

1. I have started a new brand of products. Pure INTENSITY. It is a line of products with a couple of purposes. In the short term it will be only available in my store and Aloha Nutrition (my brothers store). But in another label it will soon see distribution throughout Utah. This will be my 2nd shot at a sports nutrition line. I am using other peoples formulas for a few basic products but I already am in production on two original formulas. I also have another 3-4 in the works. I got my first shipment Friday. Sold my first couple bottles that day too.

2. I have 10 Day Results. This is my company that I started about a year ago. It has been in the national marketplace for about 7 months now. We have it in about 50 stores. Slow start but promising. There are four formulas in that line and I am currently working on 6 more. 2 will launch around January and 4 in March.

3. Vitality Nutrition. Between broken arms, miscarriages and hysterectomies I have had a few employee issues the last couple months. Thankfully I have a very willing staff. They have pitched in a covered where needed. Kimberlee is also helping me finish the remodel that kind of stalled out after the big stuff got done. She is amazing. She has finished the floor trim, done a lot of painting, fixed our broken toilet and attached our paper towel dispensers in kitchen and both bathrooms. Don't know how I functioned before her. Oh, I am also finishing up labels for my Vitality Nutrition line of products.

4. On top of all of that I also have RidgeCrest Herbals. I have been working on a great product that I am super excited about for UTIs. Recently discovered a new ingredient that has almost unbelievable clinical research on it. So now I am sorting that out and looking at a formula change to make it even more effective. In addition to that I have been feverishly working on brochures for the top 10 products in the line. Speaking of top ten, my Adrenal and Anxiety products are both in there and Adrenal is starting faster than any product in the history of the company. Hair Revive for Woman is dangerously close to number 2 in overall sales. I am also in the early rounds of product development on 5 new formulas for launch next year.

5. Oh, and if that wasn't enough, I recently started reading a book I found at the Seattle Airport. The New Rules of Marketing and PR. What a great book. So now I am in the business of self promotion. Between my radio show, my new blog; Jaredsherbalmind.typepad.com and my store and brands I am trying to position myself to be a known asset in my industry. Hopefully that will pay off down the road. We shall see.

So there it is....my severe attention deficit. oh....and....I almost forgot (well not really).

6. My family. I think I may have found some balance. I am now regularly taking Friday and Saturday off from work. Trying so hard to pack in about 32 days worth of work into the first 4 days of the week. Of course I have always taken Sundays off. So now I am mister 3 day weekend. Now, this plan doesn't always work. I do have to run to Sale Lake every Saturday to do my radio show. Also I do about 10 trade shows a year. So I do work about a weekend a month. But, I am finding that my kids really appreciate their "daddy" time and that I feel renewed when I go back to the grind stone on Monday morning. Oh, and Kimberlee and I are now doing a nice late night walk most nights. This alone time in the quiet of Syracuse, Utah is a true blessing in our lives.

I will end now, because I have been neither funny or interesting in this blog, but I have been extremely long winded. Sorry Joan.

Until later.....remember there is more than one way to slice a turtle.

INFILTRATED!!!!!

Ha! I have INFILTRATED your blog.....


We REALLY missed you today!
We had such a fun time....We had a PUMPKIN ROLL....and that was really fun...
Felicity and Lily couldn't seem to get their pumpkin's to roll straight.....
and Bridger's won a couple times, with Malachi's close behind!

Then, we decided that throwing the pumpkins would be exceptionally FUN....
and MESSY, so we did.
Some of them broke, and others, well, not much happened.

We went to a really cool park with trails, and we found an AWESOME tee-pee of sorts.
We explored, and slid around in the dirt and water.
We loved it, but it would have been better if you were there!

So, now you've been infiltrated....
and we are sharing our day with the world.....
we love you, and miss you, and can hardly wait for you to come home.

Love,
Kimberlee & kids

I Remember the Feeling

Does anyone remember that amazing song that thankfully never made it to the radio? It was the last song on Chicago 17. You know, the album with Hard Habit to Break and Inspiration? A terribly under appreciated song that Chicago never played live. A song so unknown that I couldn't find it on Playlist.com to add it to my blog. If you don't know it, do yourself a favor and pull out your old cassette tape and give it a listen.

Okay, so what does that have to do with anything? It's a good dang song. Besides that.....I was thinking and when I think sometimes good things happen.

There is a scripture (happens to be my favorite) that says "...if ye have experienced a change of heart, and if ye have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now?" Alma 5:26

I will refer back to that in a minute. But for now, I will tell you a story.

I was in Chicago last weekend and it was quite a whirlwind trip. I flew out late Friday afternoon, arrived at the hotel around 11pm. Worked all day at a convention Saturday and Sunday, and then flew home late Sunday night. On my way home from the airport, I stopped at my store to drop off some stuff. Sunday night on 500 West in Bountiful is really quiet. As I left my store, I walked out into a beautiful night. It was cloudy but through the breaks in the clouds I could see the stars. I got this feeling.

The night was cool and breezy, my very favorite type of weather. I had this feeling as I stood there and looked at the sky. It was beautiful and perfect. I was walking out of my store. MY store. I love my store, it has been in my blood since I was a little kid. I love my customers and my employees and the products I sell. I had just come home from an exhausting, but really fun and productive, business trip with my best friend. My best friend is my boss at my other job. How many people can say that all in one sentence? "Fun business trip with my best friend." I can. I love promoting my products in cities all over the U.S. I love working with my best friend and laughing and having as much fun as we did as kids, only now we earn money doing it.

So, I am standing there, having this feeling.... I started thinking about my family. My children and my beautiful wife. My beautiful, perfect family. I just kept feeling this....., this feeling. I looked at my old purple Dodge Stratus, the one with two windows that don't roll down, two constant dummy lights and one dummy light that doesn't ever come on and has been the source (or at least my excuse) for 3 times running out of gas. I looked at my purple car, and I smiled. I smiled because it's paid for, but more than that, I smiled because it was a wedding gift that came with my wife. And, as I thought of my perfect jobs, my perfect family, and my so completely far-from-perfect car, and looked out over my beautiful home town and felt the gentle breeze on this amazingly still and comfortable night, I had this soft and subtle but very real feeling.

I want to remember that feeling for the rest of my life, so when my perfect family isn't quite so perfect; and when my perfect jobs aren't all that easy; and my not so perfect car runs out of gas... I can remember that feeling, and smile at how perfect my life really is.

I paraphrase "If ye have felt that feeling, can ye feel so now?"

I can feel it now, two days later and it is a beautiful feeling that I hope I never forget.

Families that PLAY together stay together

Two reasons for this blog entry. 1st because I have made it a habit of writing reviews of musicals that I attend. 2nd, and perhaps most important, because Kimberlee was in this musical.

Auntie Elna's Traveling Cupboardware Show. A musical without equal. Well, let me re-phrase that, a Syracuse, Utah musical without equal. Yes that is right, never in my 11 years in Syracuse have I ever seen an original Syracuse musical as amazingly good as this one. Come to think of it, I have never seen an original Syracuse musical.......until now.

A little background first. About 3 months ago my dear wife found out that the illustrious Syracuse Arts Council was holding auditions for a new musical play. Being the thespian that she is, she decided to tryout. She ended up with the roll of Ophelia. Apparently, they were looking for the most strikingly beautiful member of the cast to play this particular roll. Oh, and was she ever beautiful, cast as a small town girl with a knack for cleanliness and drama. More on that later.

Once she accepted the role the usual thing happened. The director discovered that she was by far the most talented and willing participant in making this particular musical happen. So Kimberlee became more than the relatively small roll of Ophelia. She became the musical co-writer and arranger for the three original songs in the play. Once she was done with that, she started working on the costume design and production. Sewing and ironing and cutting and stitching and stenciling and and and....oh and then there were the props. Our kitchen became the prop room and the stage ended up looking very familiar to our family. I am sure there is more that she did, but off the top of my head that is all I can come up with.

So with all of the pre-show stuff, I really hoped that the three-day run of the show was worth the effort. Anyone who knows my wife would also know that although she is pretty good on stage she isn't much of an actor off of the stage. I can tell if she is happy or sad, and she is terribly honest. Leading up to the show I didn't expect much. I mean, she really downplayed it to me. She said things like "the humor is really silly and over the top, and I am not sure people will really appreciate it." She never once really told me what she thought of it.

So here comes opening night. Thursday. Here is the problem with Thursday night. It happens to be one of the nights of the week. And if it is one of the nights of the week then it must be a night that our kids have a million things going on. Thursday is swimming for Bridge, football for Mal and dance for Felicity. So, with mom in a play, dad gets limo duty. So needless to say, I didn't see opening night and apparently neither did anyone else. Kim came home and told me it was a tiny crowd and that no one laughed. Did I mention that it is a musical comedy? Ughhh.

Friday night. I really wanted to enjoy this play. I mean I really was hoping it wouldn't be as bad as I was expecting it to be. But come on, some local woman wrote it, a bunch of amateur thespians were performing it, and one of the most important people in the dang thing (my wife) had hardly said a positive thing about it in 3 months of preparation. So I went in with VERY LOW EXPECTATIONS. But I had a good attitude, cause I really wanted to like this play. We got there about 10 till 7. There were maybe 20 people in the seats. But it started to look better as 7 rolled around and actually the rec center filled up quite nicely. We had front row seats just off center stage. I did what any self respecting father would do before the show started. I made all my kids go to the bathroom and then threatened them within an inch of their lives if they didn't be quiet and pay attention.

7:05 and it is time for the show. The show starts out with a re-written version of Hello Dolly. It was fine and my only complaint was that Kim wasn't miked so I couldn't hear her voice above the others, but she had great stage presence and her trademark big beautiful smile. After the first number, the show dragged a little and was ok, but nothing great and I sat in my seat and prepared myself for a slow but mildly entertaining show. Then about 20 minutes into the show, something happened. A musical number about multi-level marketing and a great line about how it is not a scam. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I laughed out loud and so did most everyone else. After that the ice was broken and the show got better and better, and I no longer had to want to like it. I liked it. Heck I REALLY REALLY liked it. In fact, by the end, I was really excited that there was one last performance on Saturday night.

This show was stinkin funny. In fact it was hilarious at times. These small time, amateur players were really pretty dang good and if I do say so myself, Kimberlee was excellent. Now for any of you out there that are parents, think to the times you have seen your kids perform. Dance, sports, school play, whatever. If you are like me you have a series of emotions running through your body. First you have nerves. Nervous that your child is gonna get out there and forget his/her part or make a mistake or something like that. Then you watch that beautiful baby of yours perform and lo and behold, they do great and you get this sudden welling up of emotion and it culminates in a tear or two streaking down your face. So I have felt that way lots of times with Lily and Bridger. Lily has more first place dance trophies than you can shake a stick at. She and Bridger won every karate tournament they entered, and now Bridger is like a younger, shorter more bow legged Michael Phelps in the pool. But here is something I didn't expect to happen this soon. I felt that way on Saturday at Malachi's football game and then I really got it Saturday night when Kimberlee flawlessly played her role as the lovely Ophelia. I literally teared up. I haven't really had the chance to feel that for Felicity yet, but with dance season coming I have a feeling that I will be tearing up twice as often as I used to when I only had one daughter performing.

Life is beautiful, my wife is beautiful and I only feel sorry for the majority of you out there that didn't get to see how beautiful and funny she was in "Auntie Elna's Traveling Cupboard Show".

Back in the USA

Here we are in Utah. I am laying in my own bed, on my birthday, wondering if it was all really just a dream. Pretty sure it wasn't, cause we have lots of pictures and video to prove it all really happened.

I am absolutely exhausted, and even though Kim won't admit to it, she is too. We traveled for almost exactly 24 hours straight yesterday. Airplane sleep is horribly unsatisfying as you know. Besides, we were having so much fun shopping and touring Munich that we didn't leave for Frankfurt (where our plane was leaving from) until about 9 PM and with a power nap stop along the Autobahn, and we didn't arrive at our hotel until about 2 AM. Our wake up call was at 5:15. So between that and the full day of traveling I am feeling like a zombie.

I think my best blogging is done when I have some mental energy to come up with my witty remarks (well, Joan calls them witty, others may disagree). Because of this, I will just tell you for now that the vacation was unbelievable. It was, at least for now, a once in a lifetime kind of trip. Hopefully a few years from now, I will be able to say it was a twice or three times in a lifetime kinda thing. It was everything expected but in completely un-expected ways. I have a literal TON to blog about. I want to fill my blog with my thoughts and our stories over the next several days while they are still fresh in my mind. So, for those of you with a lot of time to kill, you can look forward to a whole lot of blogging from me over the next little while.

The most exciting thing right now is that Lily and Bridger are going to be home on Saturday. I miss them like I never have before. I have never been away from them for more than a week before and now I know why. Felicity and Mal will be home on Tuesday, and then we will all be together again, as it should be. We will have lots of stories to tell and lots of love to share when we are finally all under the same roof once again.

Thanks to all who have followed our trip and please make comments when we blog, it makes the blogging so much more fun.

Until later,

Jared

Iif you aren't bored with our trip yet...

I posted another time on Kkimberlee's blog.

kimberleesaint.blogspot.com

Check out Kimberlee's Blog.....

Hey, go ahead and check out Kimberlee's blog for other updates....and leave your comments please.


kimberleesaint.blogspot.com


Thanks!

.....New York, New York

This is a blog we wrote while we were in New York. We haven't had an opportunity to post it. Also, I am adding our pictures to blogs we have written, and some more to the one we haven't written.

Jared in Lavender
Kimberlee is Black

Unfortunately I have to start the blog tonight. It would be better if I had Kim's thoughts to get me started. Well, my dear, that is what marriage is all about….give a little, take a little. That's ok, I think I can come up with something. New York City was less exciting today and it all started when we ignored Frank Sinatra's advice. We didn't wake up in the city that doesn't sleep. Rather, we slept in, in the city that doesn't sleep. We set our alarm for 7:45 so we could be ready for the 9:00 shuttle and then woke up very briefly at 7:45 and bolted out of bed at 9:05. Oh well, it did cost us one leg of the tour bus schedule, but sleeping in felt really good. As it was, we got to do the “uptown” tour, and see a few cool things. Cool things like, Julliard and the bridge, and the Apollo…and the beautiful central park…did jared mention that we had to wait for almost an hour for our shuttle! It was really hot and really humid and really hard to find a street vendor that sold Gyros. We looked and looked and asked and asked again. One dude thought I was looking to exchange money when I asked “Hey man, you know any street vendors that sell Gyros (pronounced Euros)? Another said that there was no such thing.

Well, if you have never been to NYC you don’t realize just how many street vendors there are, but you also get to realize that there might be about 6 million of them but there are only about 4 varieties. Hot Dog guys, Peanut guys, Artwork guys and “genuine D & G handbag” guys. OK, there are a few others- sunglass guys, and magazine and candy guys, but for the most part you just see the same guys over and over again. But If you think there are a whole bunch of Gyro guys….well I have got news for you. My buddy Will and I went to NYC last April and looked all over for a gyro guy, we finally found a couple selling them down by Wall Street. Kim and I looked all over, and never did find one. I was defeated, and sad, and hot, and tired, and to top it off we ate a joint called the Belly Deli that by all appearances looked fantastic……and it was awful. Not to mention, expensive….we had to pay for our food by the pound, and the best stuff we ate, was the naked juice (Blue, of course) and the frozen yogurt…So there we were feeling full but unsatisfied, looking for the subway station to go back to the hotel to pick up our bags. All of a sudden, when I had given up on gyros completely, Kim says to me “Hey honey, there is a gyro guy right there.” What? Are you kiddin’ me? 20 steps away from the subway is the guy I have been looking for all day long. “But babe, I am stuffed” I say. “Just get one, you can eat it later” says my wife, sensing my anxiety. Let me clarify just a bit, it was not his anxiety that I was worried about; it was mine. Think about this for a minute, jared has been talking about “when we go to NY ---gyros this, and gyros, that” for months! Months! So, if I don’t find him a gyro…from a street vendor, not a restaurant, I am going to hear him complain and belly ache about this for the next 14 days! And, what if we don’t find one when we come back to new york in a few weeks….how long will I be the victim of his desire for a “new York, street vendor gyro???” Do you sense MY anxiety here????!!!!

So, I walk up to the gyro guy and say, “a gyro please.” He speaks fluently, just not English. I guess I should get used to this since I will wake up tomorrow in Germany. But I am pretty sure he wasn’t speaking German either. Anyway, he fixes me up a gyro, and it smells delicious, and in his native tongue, he says, “@#^*$” I say, “yes” as he squirts some tasty white sauce on my gyro. Then he says “@^%&**#,” I say “yes” not realizing that what he was trying to say was “would you like some of the hottest sauce that has ever touched the lips of a human?” I will attest to the spicy sauce comment, it was blazing!

In April, I was offered two sauces, cucumber sauce and BBQ sauce, I accepted both and realized a combination of flavors that made me long to visit Greece. In July, already full but not willing to go without that experience again, I unwittingly had the Gyro guy RUIN my Gyro with a sauce that made my lips scream for mercy. Well, there were parts of the Gyro that were delicious and reminiscent of my first NYC gyro experience, but after about half of it my lips were on fire, I had finished my water, and could not conceive of eating more of this gyro that I wasn’t hungry for in the first place. So, here we are at JFK, waiting for our Singapore Airlines flight to Frankfurt, and hoping we get some sleep on the plane. When we land it will be 11:15AM in Germany and 3:15AM in Utah. As we type, our gate has filled with people of all colors, shapes, and sizes….we are looking at a full flight. Oh, and I had quite an experience in the “international” airport bathroom….I walked in to see a completely nude women (we are still in america people…)washing her parts….then, when I went back in, she was clothed (thank heaven!) and brushing her teeth….Wow! We will be hungry, and really tired, and unable to go to bed, because if we give into jet lag it will ruin our trip. Lets hope I understand how to order condiments for my Sauer Kraut and Bratwurst. I’m just hoping to know how to ask for a bathroom….

Love you all!

P.S. I would not have belly-ached for 14 more days. I would have only belly ached for a few days, and then found something else to complain about.

A Midnight Adventure...

Okay, so let me start out by saying that we are UNABLE to post pictures or video's right now. We are having to pay to use a computer that accesses the internet, and there is no ability to download onto a public computer. So, as soon as we are able to access the internet using our own computer, I will post pictures of our trip. Sorry, for all of you waiting for visuals.

So, I left off the last blog as we headed out of Germany towards Italy. The plan was originally, to drive an hour or so, and then stop before entering Austria...Jared and I are driving completely by the directions of our GPS...now, anyone who knows a little about GPS systems knows that they are not always accurate, and many times, you can't figure out if you are really going where you think you're going. Particularly when all of the city and street names are in German/Italian. We headed out of Munich, and a couple hours later, we were very tired and decided to get a hotel. I kept punching in a variety of cities along our route, and each time the results were strange...We tried to match up our results with a map, and it was absolutely pointless...We pulled off on an exit, to a little seemingly deserted, town. We tried to find the city on our AAA map....We plugged in all kinds of information into the GPS, only to find very strange results. We did this for about 45 minutes. Then, we headed back towards the freeway and noticed a big "map" posted on the sidewalk. We went to look. Jared came back, completely frustrated, and said, "I can't figure it out." He went and looked again and came back completely shocked! We were already half way into Austria...and without our "Austrian permit" for driving. We were kind of worried, but decided to keep going. We passed through several tolls, and no one said a word. We were happy to finally arrive in Italy, where a pass is unnecessary.

We drove for a long time in Italy, and all we saw were mountains and industrial cities...no hotels, not a single one! Jared was exhausted, and I was trying to stay awake and support him (Oh, I can't drive here in Europe - I am not on the rental car, I am way too cautious, and the BIGGEST reason.....I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE A STICK SHIFT!!!!! You can all laugh all you want, but I still can't drive one....) Anyways, he kept driving and I kept trying to talk to him. Let me say this; Thank heavens for Apple and the IPOD and our wonderful car with a jack for it. If I had to drive overnight in Italy while listening to a variety of "hits" from the 80's and 90's (American hits, such as a Cher song I have never heard, something by a guy who sounded a lot like Nat King Cole and then followed up with "My Sherona") I would have crashed for sure. And believe me, I have offered to teach my otherwise quite capable wife to drive a stick, but she won't hear of it. At least not here in Europe.

Eventually, we just couldn't drive anymore, so we pulled off into a "good sized" town...or so we thought. Our GPS was supposed to be taking us to a hotel, and we never did find the hotel. The gas stations were closed, and they don't take credit. The town was completely deserted, although, it reminded me of every picture and postcard I've seen of Italian villages. We drove for about an hour (seemed like more) through the streets hoping to maybe find an LDS church to crash in...figured if we showed our temple recommends, maybe the Stake President would be kind to us??!?!? We even tried to GPS a church, but we don't know Italian, and my Spanish wasn't getting us any results!

After driving for a while, we decided to GPS Venice and head back towards the freeway. After about an hour of driving, we ended up in the mountains of wherever we were...driving on very, very small roads, with not a car in sight. I'm sure that the mountains were beautiful, however, it was 2 am, and then 3 am, and then 4 am, and then 5 am before we finally "saw" the mountains....yes folks, we probably drove through the Alps without ever seeing them.....We seriously drove the entire night and by the time we saw another freeway, it was almost 6:30 am...so, we did the next best thing (besides sleeping at the church) and pulled into a gas station to crash...and we slept. Jared in the drivers seat, and I slept in the back. We slept for around 4 hours....it was so, so crazy! (And so completely un-refreshing, yet amazingly, sort of, umm really a cool thing to do).

We got back on the road and continued towards Venice. We wanted to hit a supermarket along the way, so, we turned to our trusty GPS unit, and stopped at the next big city. We drove through streets barely big enough for our car, we nearly eliminated several bicycles and pedestrians. We followed the GPS until it kindly said, "lost satellite reception" and then, we were on our own. We navigated to a little bakery, and then to a bigger post office. Then, we left and decided not to stop again until we arrived in Venice......

OK, now for a few more of my tidbits about our fantastic voyage. First let me say that our GPS unit had led us to where we needed to be without issues until that night. It has also proven to be a wonderful companion since then. I would never want to drive Europe without it. That being said, wow that night seemed to last forever. By the time we pulled off at the Middle Eastern owned gas station for 40 winks I was literally fini (as they say in Italy). Funny thing is, as exhausted as I was then, I was even more tired after our first day in Venice. I was delirious by the time we went camping last night. Since then, sleep has been much better, even camping on a HARD piece of dirt for half the night and opting for the front seat of the car for the last 4 hours was a lot better than driving over night and sleeping in the light of day at a gas station. I am writing this two days after Kim wrote hers, so if the time line seems messed up, it is. Tonight we stay in the lap of luxury, I will tell you all about it tomorrow.

Life is Beautiful and I cannot wait till Cinque Terre. (google that and salivate at the beauty). Amazing. Until later....it is 3:30 AM in Italy, so it is bed time. (literally our average bed time has been almost exactly 3AM so far). Choi Bella........

Once again, I'll post pictures and video as soon as possible......

Camping in Italy with a bunch of kids

Night one was in Germany looking for a hotel in Munich after 1AM. The cost for a stripped down room was $101Euro or about $165 USD. So after this experience we decided that we needed to find cheaper options. Especially since we only slept there for 4.5 hours. (We were lucky enough to get the room without a shared shower and toilette..and breakfast was included and fantastic. Very German, with meats, cheeses, breads, and cold musli!...okay, so I am not really a fan of musli, but Jared seemed to like it.)

After a very short sleep, we drove into down town Munich and signed up for a white water rafting tour down the River Isar. (So, we signed up and then realized we needed to find some place to park our car....after driving around for an hour, only to realize that parking is nil is Munich, it is totally a biking city....we finally found "paid" parking for 22 E. for the day!) We met up with our American tour guide, Mike, and a really nice Phillipino girl from the Netherlands named Abigail. After meeting at the train stations, we headed to Bad Tolz. The train ride was beautiful and reminded Jared of the scenery from Band of Brothers. Once we arrive in Bad Tolz, we tried to get on the bus only to find out that the tickets we were given were the wrong ones and we needed to walk, quickly, through the city, over a bridge, along the river to the meeting place for the rafting tour. Our group had three rafts, with half of our boat speaking German and the other half speaking English...(lucky for us, our boat was the sober one of the three). The family speaking German was actually from Switzerland on holiday. The English speaking included us, Abigail, and a couple from New York. Our tour guide spoke reasonably good Enlish, enough to say "left, right, and paddle hard."

We were taken up the river, by bus, and then proceeded down the river....I was suppose to yell something that sounded very similar to "Asalan" when we were going to be hit by a tree......but, I couldn't remember the word so it was pretty much pointless. What she was supposed to yell was Austalarm. Translated "Tree alarm". Instead when we got close to overhanging branches she started laughing hysterically and couldnt yell anything in either language. Bear with us if we bore you with some of the details. This is effectively our journal of the entire trip so hopefully you will read on without falling asleep. The rafting trip was great for two main reasons, the scenery was spectacular and the river Isar is one of the most beautiful rivers I have ever seen. What Jared really enjoyed as far as scenery, was the naked women with very large boobies, as well as very large everything else....and the nake men, legs spread eagle and all! Wow! What a sight.... : - £ If she would have let me finish I was going to say that Actually the river was the most beautiful I have ever seen and the "other scenery" was quite spectacular as well. LEt me explain what I have learned about Germans. The less confident one should be about his/her body the more confident they are. Teh attractive people all had their clothes on. However the men who chose to wear clothes on the river shore were mostly in speedos and there is something inherently wrong about that. Unless you are going fot a swimming medal in the olympics you should never wear a speedo. Can I hear an AMEN?

After the rafting trip we experienced a small town in Germany. It was Sunday and several people were wering their traditional clothing including men in Lederhosen and women in their Tracht Dirndl. We also stopped for some traditional Italina Gelato in Bad Tolz. Regardless of what country you might find yourself in, Gelato is always a good idea.

Once we made it back to Munich, we decided to have our first German restaurant meal. This was intimidating. How do you order food you have never eaten in a language you can't speak? We GPSed our first choice, and walked up to the door to look at the menu. Nothing in English and not even as much as a kraut or a bratwurst listed. Oh and the prices.....ughh. SO, we found a place called weinerwurld. Can you belive it? Weiner world! We had to find this place. We drove right to a place at the address where weinerwurld was supposed to be, and found instead a little bar and grill that was a wursthaus. I know what that means. So we went there.

We were alone in the place, it was very authentic feeling, and kind of in the outskirts of town. The guy at the bar spoke very limited English. He did have one copy of his menu in English though. YEAH. We ordered and wow. Wait I understated that WOW. Amazing, authentic German cuisine. Kim loved hers and I loved mine, and we had some extra tasy cheese and bread as an appetizer. If I had our notes here I would tell you what we got. Oh well, I will post that later. Our food was absolutely the best. I had some kind of egg noodle with a turkey and mushroom sauces...it was so, so tasty. Jared enjoyed something with pickles, and potatoes, and roast....it was also very tasty. We even tried pronouncing the names of our food, I was not successful, but, I have a hard time pronouncing anyword that is more than 10 letters!

After eating, we decided to make our way towards Venice. We planned to drive for an hour or so and stop someplace to sleep.....

We are going to post this blog, and continue on another blog.

Here we are in Venice

OK, So internet isnt nearly as available here in Europe as we were led to believe. When it is available it is about 6Euros for 40 minutes. We have a myriad of things to say, and other blogs we have written but been unable to post, so we will post them as soon as we have internet available with our own computer. Suffice it to say, we are seeing everything, and travelling much like vagabonds...(how many of you sleep in your car on vacation???? Or, say, at a gas station along the highway? Or, think that you are in Germany, when you happen to be almost all the way through Austria...without an Austrian vehicle permit??????!!!!) We are pretty sure that we climbed and descended over the Alps...however, it was too dark to tell and we are simply being guided by our trusty Garmin GPS.....how were we suppose to know that once we left the freeway in Italy, that there was no going back?

Good news is, we are safe and sound. And we are extremely hungry in a town full of Pizzarias. We are exhausted, as we have yet to get more than 4 hours of sleep in any one stretch.

Later, we will tell you about our white water rafting experience, yummy German food, and how ridiculously weak the dollar is in Europe....as it is, we have used our alloted time on this internet connection....

We love you all.
Thanks for the posts, we will try to update you again soon!

Mary Poppins???? Yes, you read it right!

Kimberlee's is in Black
Jared's is in Lavender

Well, besides having our first experience on the subway here in New York, we also managed to get lost....several times.....But, we are safely back in our hotel room. We wandered around Times Square for the entire day, well, what was left of it after our long nap!

So how the heck is one to know which direction to take on the subway? I mean, Brooklyn street numbers are different than Manhattan street numbers and we were coming from Queens to begin with. We only made 2 mistakes that only cost us about 30 minutes, but 30 minutes underground in a muggy, urine drenched subway stop seems longer than 30 minutes....say anywhere else. Oh well, by the end of the night we were seasoned vets at subway riding and we had a little fun watching the ummm, shall I say, variety of people that were riding along with us.

My fabulous husband (We will see if the superlatives like fabulous, wonderful and fantastic keep up after 14 days of me without any distractions. My guess is that about the time we are hitting Venice the the new adjectives od choice might be more like annoying, confused and frustrating) said that I could see ANY show I wanted to see while we were here......unfortunately for me, that was probably the most difficult choice I will have to make on this trip....I love musicals, and there were so many good ones playing, and even more new ones that I haven't seen yet! I decided to eliminate all the shows I have already seen, but I still wanted to go to one that I was fairly familiar with the music! I decided I really wanted to see Mary Poppins. (OK, here is where I get to show a little of my fabulousness that will most certainly dry up by trip's end. You see, I am sitting there at the Marquee looking at all of the 50% off shows available for tonight. There were several that had been on Kim's short list still available. But I told my dear wife that any show she wanted was fine with me and I meant it. So we decided to pay full price for Mary Poppins. MARY POPPINS? A children's show? A Disney movie turned musical show? It seemed like a bad choice to me at the time, but I kept my mouth shut and smiled as we walked the 4 blocks from the Marquee to the box office. When we got there I told my beautiful bride that I didn't want crappy seats like we had at Spamalot in Seattle, so we splurged and got amazing seats, 7th row center. Now, I was still unconvinced, but she was happy and I figured that scoring points early might help me out when I do something stupid in Europe.....say crash into a pedestrian or go wrong way to traffic on the Autobahn.) Now, although I have NEVER actually seen the movie, I do know the music. (I have never seen the movie either, I mean...Mary Poppins, come on.) I have to say, Mary Poppins is up there on my list of favorites now...right next to Wicked! It was such an amazing show. The scenery was out of this world! I could not believe how intricate and huge the set was! WOW! And, the cast was fantastic.....it was absolutely the most amazing show...All the new songs are completely in line with the originals, and the new arrangements of the original songs are even better than before!

Well, Kim was exhausted from our Red eye flight and getting roughly 3 hours of sleep last night, so that's all you get from her tonight, if only you could be so lucky with me. But alas, I go on. You know, I have always been a guy who feels like he is right at least 98% of the time. So it is hard for me to be proven wrong by my wife who has 6 years less experience on this planet than I do. But....Oops she did it again. Mary Poppins was flipping great. A real eye opener for me. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love old Disney stuff, but when there are so many other, bigger and seemingly better options (particularly at half price) why do something you can see on DVD with better actors? Well, I will tell you why, because the chimney sweep was amazing and Mary was captivating in her performance. I don't know diddly squat about Broadway but I know great entertainment when I see it, and I saw it tonight. The children who played the Banks kids were great and Mr. and Mrs. Banks were fantastic as well. Supercalifragilisticexpealidocious is a great word and a great song (although I am pretty sure it would be better by Dream Theater) and that dang Poppins made me long for the Nanny I never had. What a great night in a great theater (which was obviously built when the average height of an American theater goer was about 5'2", the leg room...hah, made a coach class flight look spacious, I love being 5'6"), with a great woman.

As for food, the hotel food was fantastic.....the NY food, well, it wasn't nearly as good. We stopped in what seemed like a great little bakery, serving a variety of food....and nothing we ate tasted very good.....Alas, we will try again tomorrow....and it is Jared's choice on the food....I'll let you know what I think about street vendor gyro's and Gray's Papaya hot dogs.......

Tomorrow will bring a lot of touring and learning from our double decker bus guides what makes NYC so NYC. We will also enjoy a street vendor Gyro and a Gray's Papaya hot dog and I will be giving full food reviews as well. Until then.....We wish you were here....well, some of you....well, actually it is much more romantic without any of you here. So go on your own dang vacation. Blog ya tomorrow.

Hmmmm...Thinking about everything

Thinking about things lately, and thinking some of you just might want a run of the mill update. You see, I have a hard time just writing in my blog for the sake of writing what's going on. I prefer to write some long tirade about babies or Broadway. I especially refrain from writing about things that I don't think I can make funny. But.....I have a lot going on in my life right now so I will attempt to fill you in, and at the same time be funny and insightful (well, funny anyway).

VITALITY

Having fun with:

1. Adding 1000 square feet of space for a measly $15,000 in construction costs.
2. Matching up a slate floor that already exists with a brand new slate floor.
3. Watching 2 well trained employees leave in the same week, and hire and train 4 new employees in the same month.
4. Realizing that when I am at Vitality for 60 or so hours per week that sales increase dramatically.
5. Wishing that when I was away from Vitality that sales wouldn't decrease so dramatically.
6. Substantially enjoying my opportunity to be a radio show personality, and realizing that some people actually love to hear me talk. Who'da thunk it?
7. More than anything, I have come to the realization that I absolutely love what I do, and that I am extremely blessed to feel that way about how I support my family. Thanks Mom and Dad for showing me the ropes, and allowing me to take over the family business.

Not funny yet huh? Well, it might not be...for whatever reason I just don't feel it tonight. Sorry.

RidgeCrest Herbals

1. Before you laugh at my typing skills....RidgeCrest IS one word.
2. My first formula for RC was Hair Revive. A clever product for a bald guy huh? Alright enough of the snickering. It is for women who are losing hair and it works. I get love letters about this stuff. Anyway, Hair Revive is now officially the second best selling product at RidgeCrest after the ClearLungs family (also one word).
3. Products number 2 and 3 are launching faster than any product in company history, Adrenal Fatigue Fighter is a big hit already, and has made it on the shelves of the Vitamin Shoppe chain, nationwide. Anxiety and Adrenal have been picked up by most of our major distributors and some big catalogs. I believe that both of them will eventually outsell Hair Revive.
4. My newest formula is for UTI (Urinary Tract Infections) and should launch by years end. I actually think it may beat the other three out in sales.
5. Again.....love what I do and am very blessed to have the opportunity to do it....and make money to boot.

Side projects:

1. My new line that I have been working on is very close to seeing the store shelves.
2. I am knee-deep in new ideas for private label projects, too bad I have absolutely no time to get them rolling. I hope to nail a couple new formulas down by years end though.
3. My formula for Myogenix is selling well. It is called Liver Fix and is a powerful liver cleanser designed not only to detoxify but also enhance liver function. Kim has been using it and it has just about eliminated her migraines.


Our home and family:

1. What can I say? My wife does so much around here it is absolutely amazing. Our house looks better by the week, and on the side she has found time to help out a whole lot at the store.
2. Malachi asked me today if he could call me dad. I told him that he could "...call me dad, daddy, daddio or any other name that means dad." He replied "ok, can I call you padre?" That's was pretty funny....but more than anything it was really awesome to hear him say that he wants to call me DAD. What an honor that less than a year after I married him mom, he feels comfortable enough to call me dad. He is a heck of a kid, and I am thrilled at how our relationship has grown. Felicity is also becoming more and more comfortable with me......however, it is coming a little more slowly.......no matter, I can wait.
3. All in all, as I approach June 29th(my one year anniversary with Kimberlee), I look back in awe at how amazing my life is. Yes, I have been through a lot over the last few years. Did I have any inkling that I would come out of it feeling so amazingly lucky, blessed, fortunate? Absolutely not. I find myself wondering what I have done to deserve this. But then, maybe I shouldn't, I dont want to jinx it.
4. Stay tuned.....cause I am confident there is more to come.

Thanks to all who comment and love and care about me and mine.

till next time..........

....Joan's big mouth.

Good grief. Here come two of my favorite family members into town and what do they bring with them? Their beautiful children? Yes, but that's not all. Their wit and charm? Yep, but there is more. Their exciting news that they are moving to Utah in the next couple months? You got that right. But on top of all of that.......Joan brought this......."So, which one of you is resistant to having more kids?"

What kind of a question is that, Joan? I mean come on here. Isn't that a little personal? Kimberlee and I have had this conversation...believe me, we have had it more than once. We had it before we got married. So, I will tell you the deal for anyone that cares. The answer to the question is...ME. I am resistant. Why? Well, lets see....is it my lack of love for children and babies in particular? Are you nuts? Absolutely it isn't that. Anyone who knows me knows that I love children. I love our children, I could and would love more but.......

1. My beautiful wife bears the brunt of the load around the house. She has taken on the responsibility of learning to raise two children she didn't even know until two months before we got married. And even though my children are fantastic and very lovable, that is a huge responsibility for anyone.

2. Although I am extremely wealthy, getting children here is really expansive. I have very possibly the worst health insurance plan you can buy without government assistance. Raising children is even more expensive.

3. Kimberlee tends to have under-developed premature babies. (Scares me to death)

4. STRESS. My wife is such an amazing mom. She does so much with and for our children and makes me so happy with her efforts. However, it stresses her out and that stresses me out.

5. AGE. I am old. By the time our prospective children turn 18 I will be dang near retirement age. I was kind of hoping to have half my life left by the time my kids leave the house. I know this one sounds really selfish, but think about it. What can a husband and wife do when they are empty nesters in their 40's? ANYTHING THEY WANT. We could see Europe, Asia and all of those beautiful beaches all over the world. We could serve a mission or three. We could get season tickets to the Jazz and actually go to the games without dance, gymnastics, baseball, football, soccer, basketball or any other children's activity getting in the way.

6. Apparently children come in pairs even when they aren't twins. Everyone, and I mean everyone (including Joan) has told me, "well if you have another, you have to have at least two." I mean, jr. has got to have someone to play with.

So.......are any of these reasons compelling at all? Am I selfish? Am I cold hearted and too practical?

To prove that I am not......I will give equal time to the Pro's that have been bouncing off all those con's I just mentioned.

1. I love and adore children. I love babies. I am hopelessly attached to my children and am becoming so to my newest additions (Felicity and Malachi). I could and would love my new children.

2. I am a very patient and loving father. That is not to say that I am a perfect father. I do believe though that I am a very good father and I know that Kim is a very good mother. Children could wind up in a lot worse places than our home.

3. It would help teach our older children responsibility. Watching us raise babies and helping us care for them would be excellent for them. Not only that but by the time baby number one is weened Lily would be old enough to babysit. Felicity would not be far behind. Babysitting would not be a problem.

4. I always wanted more babies with my first wife.

5. I would love to see what a combination of Kim and I would produce. I am sure we would have beautiful babies together.

6. Finally and possibly the most compelling and also reversible argument. It would bring the family together. Right now it is hers and mine and we are trying to build ours. A baby would give us something that is all of ours together. I so much want to believe this is true. But I do see a possible dark side of this. What if any one of the four we have now senses that there is a deeper love for the only child/children that we have together. Real or imagined this could be devastating to any one of our four. I tend to lean much more heavily to the side that it would bring our family together, but........lingering doubt.

So, here it is.....my most serious blog to date. Sorry to those of you who read my blog for the humor. But in all seriousness I would love some feedback on this one. I don't particularly care which side you come down on. I don't know if I will agree with or be influenced by what you say, but I would like to at least hear some other points of view.

My wife has basically put this question away for the last few months and we are just focusing on making our family as whole, safe and comfortable for our children as we possibly can. But I am not getting any younger and with each passing day it seems that our family gets stronger and more stable. So maybe now is the time to..........

Please comment if you have something to say.

Oh, and by the way Joan......thanks for bringing it up, I needed to type all of this out to process it a bit anyway.

Thanks,

Jared

...Responding to my wifey's tag...

8 Things I am passionate about...

In no particular order....
1. My Wife
2. My Kids
3. Vitality (my store)
4. My formulas
5. My close friends
6. The Gospel
7. Fantasy Football.....I know, I am a huge Geek
8. Music......From Dream Theater to Neil Diamond and a whole lot in between

8 Books I have read in the past six months

1. This is not fair, I have 3 jobs and 4 kids and, and, and
2. The Complete History of Dream Theater
3. An inconvenient Book
4. A published study on Sensoril Ashwagandha extract (this was excellent)
5. 7 labels 437 times each
6. at least 500 pages of anecdotal evidence of various herbs for the following ailments; cold and flu, constipation, weight loss, appetite control, water retention, urinary tract infections, high cholesterol, anxiety and stress, energy and adrenal exhaustion.
7. Reading the Book of Mormon
8. Oh, and Joan and Kimberlee's blogs....they are my favorite

8 Things I often say

1. I love you
2. I miss you (been gone a lot lately)
3. What, your quitting? (lost a couple of employees this week)
4. Awesome, those are selling like crazy. ( Adrenal and Anxiety from RidgeCrest are setting records)
5. Excuse me ( been a little gassy lately)
6. Holy Cow, you are amazing (to my ridiculously motivated wife)
7. Hebrew Nationals (this has been the focus of a very intense series of messages between Joan and I) VERY INTENSE
8. Our kids are rotten/perfect...depending on the moment

8 Things I want to do before I die

1. Serve a mission with my wife
2. Become sealed to my wife
3. See all four of our kids become productive and faithful adults despite the unpleasantness they have all been through at their tender ages
4. New York City with my wife
5. See Switzerland and Germany
6. A Redskins game
7. See Brandon and Joan move to Utah
8. Have a nationally syndicated radio show and a book published

8 Things I have learned or remembered again in the last 12 months

1. That marriage can be completely fulfilling for both people involved
2. That being considerate is possibly the most valuable personality trait one can posses. Being considerate of your spouses feelings makes everyone happier and being considerate of your co-worker or employees is essential to happiness at work
3. Caring for the children the Lord has blessed you with is the most rewarding thing you can do
4. You can learn to love other people's children as your own if you use a gospel perspective. And although I am not quite there yet, I am getting closer by the day
5. Working for yourself is extremely rewarding and ridiculously challenging all at the same time
6. There really are only 24 hours in a day (even in a leap year)
7. I don't juggle as well as I thought I could (that is metaphorically speaking........oh wait and literally too)
8. I like to Blog and at least three very wonderful women enjoy reading what I write

8 People I want to tag

1. Mom
2. Joan
3. Already saw Kim's
4. Will
5. Alison
6. Craig
7. Britt
8. Brandon....I guess, cause Kim put him last...and he is sort of a funny guy, I mean, he is ok as far as that stuff goes...I think he is alright, I suppose.

So, there are my deep and often poignant thoughts about eights.

See ya

...It’s Delightful, it’s delovely….?

The Wizard of Oz. Don’t get me started. For all of the 35 years, that I have inhabited this earth, I have avoided "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz." My ex-wife, several girlfriends, and even my children have tried to strong-arm me into watching this show. Then it happened. The perfect set of circumstances. But wait a minute, let me go into more detail for a moment.

I have made it my mission to NOT see this movie. I mean, it is a cultural icon. Everyone is shocked when I say I have never seen it. I have always thought that it was part of what set me apart from the crowd. So, basically, I planned to go to the grave without seeing this movie. So, what was the perfect set of circumstances?

Well, it all started about 13 months ago, when I met the most amazing woman in the entire world. You see, she is a thespian (something else I never thought I would do, marry a thespian). When she found out I hadn't seen the Wizard of Oz, she vowed to change that within our first year of marriage. Of course, I had no intention of allowing her to break my streak. But she is an evil genius. Within weeks of us getting married she was going to heavy metal concerts, and without a complaint. I'm sure this is something she thought she would never do. She went to Trans-Siberian Orchestra, not once but twice and even agreed to force Brandon and Joan into going with us, as our Christmas present to them. She watched as I took Will, not her, to New York City on a business trip. New York City, home of Broadway. I won't say she did that without complaint, but certainly without too much of a fuss. So, then comes Julie's wedding in L.A.. A chance to go for a weekend to L.A., with my beautiful wife, and without kids....sure I said, let's do it. Then coincidentally (or was it) it just happens that the national tour of Wicked (the sequel to the Wizard) is in L.A. that weekend. So I get a phone call from Kim one day, while I am busy at work, and she says....."Hey, Wicked is in L.A., will you please take me?" Well, I am busy and I try hard to spoil my wife, so I say, "Sure babe, but I gotta run." Later that week she has got me listening to the sound track for the musical in my car.

RANT TIME:

Show Tunes. SHOW TUNES. I hate show tunes, or rather, I hate show tunes outside of a show. Sure they have their place, Gene Kelly "Singin' and Dancin' in The Rain", or even "I Dreamed a Dream" from Les Mis. But let's face it people, with very few exceptions, show tunes are only palatable within the confines of a show. Once isolated, they just sound like bad Lex DeAzevedo songs, sung by people who couldn't make it on the radio.

OK, back to my story. So Kim has me "preparing" for the big event (not the wedding) by listening to these awful show tunes on my way back and forth to work. I can deal with this, I mean, we are spending $100 a piece on these tickets (something she neglected to mention when she asked me to take her), so I might as well try to enjoy this thing right? But then the other shoe drops....."Honey", she says...."you would understand the show much better if you saw the Wizard of Oz".

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO."

"Kim, I have all but sworn an oath to never watch that movie. I can understand the musical just fine without watching it. I know about the Lion without a brain and the Tin Man with no courage and the straw man without a heart. I get all that. I know about the little people who get high in a field of poppies. I learned about that from Dr. Demento. I know about the green city and the red slippers. I know all about Kansas, I lived next to Dorothy for 2 years on my mission. Heck, I have even lived through a Kansas tornado. I even really like some of Toto's songs, they are a decent band. Please don't make me watch the movie."

"But honey", she says, "you really need to, it will make the musical soooo much better".

Then it all comes back to me, the Dream Theater concert, the TSO shows, the Metal concert with all of the female vocalists (I mean she even had Linsey do goth makeup for the occasion). Need I mention New York? I could have refused and stuck by my principles, but would that be fair? Nope. That being said, is it fair to be such a perfect wife that I have lost the ability to say no to almost any request? Probably not, but, either way, she had me squarely over a barrel.

I caved. Not only did I watch the movie, she didn't already own it, so I BOUGHT the dang thing.

Worse yet. I can't say it was a bad movie. I can't say it was a particularly good movie, but it wasn't too bad. Apparently, I had some of the details a bit messed up. But the basics were pretty much what I figured they would be. Dorothy was fine, I guess, but Toto wasn't a band, it was a dog. If I had to pick my favorite thing......I guess it was that I made it almost 36 years without seeing it.

Now, as for the musical, Wicked. WOW, what a great show! I really, really liked it. Heck, I'll even throw this out there for ya....I loved it. The singing was fantastic, the thespians, every last one of them, were great. The green witch, the hot blond witch, the wizard, they were all great. If the tour comes near you.....SEE IT. It isn't quite on par with a TSO concert, but it was pretty stinkin' good, and I would be happy to see it again. Heck, I've been singing "No one mourns the wicked" for a week. I've been listening, voluntarily to the soundtrack while preparing breakfast for the kids. It's absolutely ridiculous. How did this happen?.........

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

My oath, my principles, most of what I hold dear, I threw to the wind. Next thing you know, I'll be starring in community theater. My wife is truly an evil genius, and yet I love her. I understand her methods now, but I will still blindly fall into more of these traps as the years go by, because I love her. I undoubtedly, unequivicably love her.

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Until next time.....remember, "No one mourns the wicked".....no one.........

...Traveling, Expanding and Missing

YES, traveling. It has taken its tole. And, since I never seem to tire of travel, it is a surprise to hear myself say that. Over the last 37 days, I have been out of town for 21. Maybe that isn't a big deal to people who travel all the time, but to me, it's a lot. Stack that on top of the 16 projects I have going on right now, remodeling and expanding my store, launching 2 new products for RidgeCrest and 1 for Myogenix and launching a new brand all together etc, etc. It's a lot to deal with, and I am really burned out right now, or at least I thought I was until today at RidgeCrest when I think I had a brilliant idea for my newest product. My new UTI formula just received a great new twist. But, I won't bore you with herbal mumbo jumbo. Suffice it to say, I am tired and glad to be home. This is what I have learned from my time on the road.

1. If I want to get a whole lot done around the house, all I have to do is leave. Let's see, so far while gone on business trips I have seen my beautiful wife beautify our home by.....completely re-doing our bedroom, painting our entire upstairs, putting in a huge garden and so on. What an amazing woman.
2. When I leave, I am missed. But not by my kids. It used to be, before Kim came along, that my kids missed me a lot while I was gone. Actually, they did quite a bit for the first 6 months of our marriage as well. But the last 4 trips I have taken, they don't seem to miss me a bit. Kim does such a great job with them that they just don't need me all that much. Now Kimberlee, Kimberlee loves and misses me greatly......that may have something to do with the kids.
3. No matter how good the power forward for the Jazz plays in the regular season, he never seems to play all that well in the playoffs.
4. Chicago stuffed pizza IS as good as it is cracked up to be.
5. When I dress like a pirate, I look fabulous.
6. When I dress like a pirate, 16 year old girls think I am hot.
7. I dress like a pirate everyday now.
8. There is only one Potbelly sandwich and it is amazing.
9. The Newport Beach temple is absolutely beautiful.
10. Not only is my store expanding, but due in large part to Potbelly's and Giordano's Pizza Parlor.....so is my stomach.
11. My kids are amazing. All 4 of them. And even though they don't love me enough to miss me while I am gone, they still love me quite a bit, and I miss them like crazy when I am gone.
12. I love what I do for a living, and some day it is going to pay off. ( I hope)
13. My wife is perfect for me, and I will tell you why: because I am a complete and utter cheeseball when it comes to romance. I like it gooey and cheesy. She does too. Thank goodness, cause I think I would drive certain other women crazy with the amount of cheddar that goes into my ideas for gifts and surprises. I'll let her tell you about the latest one, just know that I love doing it, and she seems to really love receiving it. What a team!
14. I AM OVER-OBLIGATED.

So, here I am, nearly a month gone by since my last blog. I would love to do one every week, but I just can't seem to find the time or inspiration, and as it is this blog is really not as entertaining as I would like it to be. Please, give me another chance, because in a few hours I intend to follow up with a much funnier subject.....Broadway.

Until then, I will be blogging on my radio show blog.

I love you all, or at least all of you that I love anyway.

Bye

...How I got a radio gig and something about a perfect spouse.

This one will be short and sweet. In fact the main reason I am even doing this blog is because I want Joan to leave me another sweet comment. (you're very good for my ego Joanie). Speaking of ego, would someone please tell my wife to quit making me sound like such a saint? (pun intended). I mean come on, we are newlyweds. I could end up being a total charmless oaf by this time next year. You just can't tell with men. Ah, but none of this really has anything to do with the title of this blog right?

So here it is. Back in the day when I was still young and ambitious. OK I am still ambitious. Anyway, way back then, I wanted to be a DJ on a rock radio station. And then later as I got older and proved it by starting to listen to talk radio, I decided it would be super cool to be a sports radio commentator. Well, Dadgum if dreams don't come true.....almost, sometimes, sort of. I am on the radio. It isn't FM Rock, or as my friend Brittini would say....PM rock. (she gets confused easily). It's not sports commentary either. But it is sports radio. And you know what it is commentary. It is nutrition commentary. While not as sexy as Sports or Rock Radio, it is something I know a lot about. And you know what, I'm kinda good at it. Neil, the show host tells me that I am really good at it and that it is only a matter of time before I get my own show if I want it. Thats great news for a couple of reasons, one is obvious, I love to talk and if there is actually anyone out there willing to listen, yippee. But along with that, in the five weeks I have been doing the show it has been really awesome for my store. Plus as usual I have lots of ideas and plans that are larger than life all of which could benefit from more exposure.

What it boils down to is that a slightly different version of my dream is now a reality and that is pretty stinking cool. So if you people are bored enough and don't have access to something reasonably entertaining, listen in. I mean, you guys reading this right now, are my audience I guess. After all, you're either incredibly interested in my beautiful family, or you are incredibly lacking in things to do with your time. I guess it just depends on how you look at it. It is on 1280AM in Salt Lake City at 9:30 AM. And I think you can listen to it streaming online at 1280thezone.com. Let me know if that works ok?

Now for the interesting and sentimental part of my blog.

My wife is amazing. Do you guys realize that in the 9 months that we have been married, that she has:
1. Cleaned out and sold off nearly every corner of this house.
2. Painted half of the upstairs.
3. Completely taken over the finances from someone who generally pays the bills at least by the second notice.
4. Sealed our new tile floor.
5. Re arranged, organized and cleaned out our garage.
6. Installed a keypad for the garage door.
7. Installed a ceiling fan and at least a couple other light fixtures I can think of.
8. Installed a new mail box (twice).
9. Completely re-decorated our bedroom (while I was away for two nights on business).
10. Bought and assembled 4 dressers for the kids.
11. Bought and assembled 2 beds for the kids.
12. Bought and Assembled our bed and dresser.
13. Bought and assembled our entertainment center downstairs.
14. Nearly won our NCAA tournament challenge.
15. Revolutionized the homework process in our home. Amazingly smart this one.
16. Set up Friday as piano lesson day for half our neighborhood.
17 . Started teaching all 4 of our children the piano as well.
18. Weeded, weed barriered and barked our whole yard.
19. Made jammies for all of us for Christmas as well as the cutest clown costumes for the whole family for Halloween.
20. Made me one of the happiest men on the planet.

AND THAT IS JUST THE TOP 20. And I swear people, it took me about 10 minutes to come up with that list. There is a list a mile long of the amazing things she has done and does do on a daily basis to make life as her husband absolutely remarkable.

And with all of that, she gets all emotional when I give her some chocolates and a candle.

I love this woman and the good Lord knew what he was doing when he put the two of us together.

So this was a weird blog. I started out all excited about the radio and ended up laying in bed next to my beautiful wife and realizing (without her looking over my shoulder by the way)....realizing that I am so happy and so blessed to have her that I needed desperately to tell all you wonderful people about it. I love my wife, I love our kids. And tomorrow, I just might mention that on the radio.

Love to all who care to read this. Oh and by the way, leave comments (that means you Tamu and any of you others who read this thing incognito). I love to read what people have to say about my virtual insanity....it is virtual isn't it........

.....Vacations, hormones, and why I love my family....

Family Vacation.....So all of you who are familiar with my beautiful wife, and her slightly less hysterical, yet far more historically accurate blog, know that we went on a really long in miles and very short in time road trip. And that, my friends, is the lead candidate for run-on sentence of the year.

Anyway, my wife has a great blog at kimberleesaint.blogspot.com, check it out. As for our trip, it rocked. We saw an aircraft carrier, a grundle of wild animals, and had a waitress that threw bubblegum and straws at us. We drove 2000 miles, and yet only averaged 3.6 miles per hour for an hour and a half, going through Baker, CA. We ate the absolute best "spicy fried pickles" of all time. We saw Saturn, Pleiads and Orion. We listened to #10 seed Davidson barely lose to #1 seed Kansas, at the buzze. Then, later, watched Kansas win the national championship. (Wouldn't it be cool if it would have been Davidson)? We sat in vintage WWII planes and saw the Pacific ocean. We ate authentic Italian pizza, in an authentic Italian restaurant, served by an authentic Italian waiter in not so authentic Little Italy. We saw real ghosts in a real ghost town and ate really hot cinnamon candy and really bad but really expensive fudge. We got hotel rooms for really cheap using hotwire.com ($39 including breakfast). I'm pretty sure we did more, but after the 14 hour drive home I am still in need of a really long, real vacation.

Hormones...

I love my wife, I love my daughters and as a general rule, I love women. (Although I think I am wise in excluding my girlfriend and concubines from this conversation). I will drop an excerpt here from a comment I left on my beautiful sister in law's blog last week.

"Joan,

Let me tell you something. I uhhh, well, maybe ummmm, OK, I don't understand a bit. This is what I know about it. There are a lot of things that happen once a month that put me in a less than happy position. The mortgage comes due, Alimony, Home Teaching (wink), You know, all the un-pleasantries of life that constantly reappear. There are seasonal things. Weeds, quarterly taxes, another disappointing season for the Redskins. But there is NO THING like that time of the month. I can understand all the other stuff. But a Period and the unpredictable (to say the least) hormone swings that accompany it......AHHHHH. What is a man supposed to do? I mean lets face it, although Brandon is a great guy, he isn't perfect. But, I on the other hand, am. The perfect husband, everyone would agree, (my ex excluded of course). How can a man like me ever deserve the uneasiness that I feel for 5-6 days out of every month? It's not fair. I mean we are talking approximately 15% of my married life spent wondering if the next thing I say might get my sorry butt thrown on the couch for the night. The answer....well, there doesn't appear to be one. So, I will say this, Brandon, you're most likely doing great and that vortex you speak of is filled with seemingly great husbands swirling around trying to catch their breath. Now, with all of that being said and realizing that this is not my blog, I will finish by saying this. All of the above references to pain and monthly discomfort are only memories now of my previous marriage. Of course my beautiful, perfect wife Kimberlee would never put me in such a position. Every day of every month is yet another day in paradise. Much love....Jared "

So, there you have it. I have three perfect women, whom I love, living with me..... and there is never a problem with hormones at all.

Thanks for any comments and for your love and support of my beautiful family.

J

....what happens to a really short man on a really tall rock

Let me explain something about getting married quickly. When a guy like me (bald, short, portly, somewhat gassy), meets a girl like Kimberlee (beautiful, caring, talented and more than a little sexy, oh, and thankfully gullible), he has to take the opportunity. So to get married in less than three months was a no-brainer for me. But there are challenges that come with such a rash decision. Take for instance the fact that when I proposed to Kim I had no idea that she was completely fearless. Although in retrospect, she had to be to marry me. But she happened upon a guy who is dang near terrified of putting up my Christmas lights. So when she said, "hey babe, let's go down to Zion National Park and go hiking", I'm thinking to myself, "that sounds like fun, it will be beautiful weather, and a nice hike will be good for my lazy carcass." So, to Zion we went. We bought a book of short hikes and picked one that sounded pretty challenging, Angel's Landing. 4.8 miles round trip and a mere 1500 foot ascent. Don't get me wrong, I like a challenging hike, I love the beauty of a national park and I don't lose heart at the thought of climbing most of the way. That being said, Holy Basil!!! Climbing 1500 feet is no big deal until you realize that the last 500 of it is perched on a ledge of sorts with a sheer cliff on either side of you. It's nothing to hike 4.8 miles until you see the snow and ice on the ground, below the chain they have installed as your only grip on dear life. Hiking in the splendid beauty is absolutely pleasant until you start feeling like Frodo Baggins and his buddy Samwise Gamgee on the edge of an icy cliff only without the benefit of hobbit feet to secure your footing. I will be attaching photos as evidence that a sudden and horrific death stared me right in the face, and I, somewhat flinchingly, stared back.


Now that I am back home safe and sound, I am really glad that my absolutely fearless, mountain goat of a wife dragged me up on the perilously icy, ridiculously high rock they so ironically call Angel's Landing, (I over heard a fellow coward refer to it as the Devil's Ledge). It was amazing, beautiful and both figuratively and literally breath taking, not unlike my wife.

Other than that, life is good at the St. Clair home, and with me personally. I now have a regular gig on the radio almost every Saturday morning on 1280 "The Zone". I do a nutrition oriented spot and take callers, live, on the air. It has been a lot of fun and so far, has been very beneficial for Vitality. RidgeCrest Herbals is launching my two newest formulas, Anxiety Free and Adrenal Fatigue Fighter, next week at the big convention in Anaheim, CA. Myogenix is also launching my new Liver Fix formula next week. All pretty boring for some of you, but super exciting for me.

Kimberlee and I are getting along great and as far as our children go......they actually seem to be growing together better all the time. Felicity hangs all over me, and Malachi prods at me until I tackle and tickle him half to death. Bridger calls Kim mom from time to time, and Lily has really become attached to Kim too. They share a love of reading, and have bonded a lot when they read to each other. We are family. We love you all.

Please pray for my safety, you never no what Kim might try to make me do next.